Our Wedding Quilt + Our Ceremony Reading
It's just a quilt but its imbued with endless meaning
and writing this post about just-a-quilt made me cry decently hard
I'm sure you're used to seeing this by now, but all photos in this post are by Shari + Mike Photographers.
As seen on Green Wedding Shoes
When Marie + her fiance gifted our quilt to us as our wedding gift they said they could picture us picnicking on it with our kids one day. A handmade quilt feels like it's something your grandkids will have on their guest room bed + will say "this is my grandparent's wedding quilt" and their guests will be all like, "omg that's so quaint, I love that you have this!"
Whatever, theoretical grandkid's guest, we were super hipster + not at all quaint in our day.
I'm not sure we're going to have grandkids one day, but
When we were getting married + all I was doing was thinking about is forever + what that means + it gets very emotional + fills you with all sorts of love + dreams for all the things you can accomplish as a couple together + the family + life you're going to build + how that quilt is going to be there through it all.
But of course, as it's us, there's a lot more to it than just that.
For our wedding, Kyle + I wanted to celebrate our love of our neighbourhood with our best people, so we decided to feature the East Van Crows that fly over our apartment every night as our wedding's motif. We have so many wonderful memories of seeing the sunset from our rooftop + picnicking with our friends over in Dude Chilling Park watching the crows,
so much so that Kyle included them in his vows to me,
“I find myself watching the east van crows a lot. I hope we can draw inspiration from and be like those crows, unafraid to strike out in search of adventure while knowing we will always have our relationship to fly home to.”
Ugh, KJH, hit me right in the feels. That's exactly what I want to do with you. And why I wanted to marry you.
The only problem is that crows are gross + creepy AF
Fortunately, at the time, one of my sister's best friends Alison of Rain People and Seek Shelter was working as a quilter [no longer making quilts but still stunning handmade items]+ suggested we stylized them into a flying geese pattern. Triangles are not particularly gross + creepy AF, + so that's what we did.
Which of course means that when we registered for our handmade wedding quilt we selected a flying geese pattern. Alison dyed the back by hand with indigo to match the other details at our wedding, and added in a sneaky piece of pink as a nod to our wedding colours. And then my sister embroidered it with a quote from the reading at our ceremony.
ok i dare you to read that + then this + see that photo of Kyle and not cry.
I did not get through typing it without tears. I feel like it cannot be done. re-reading it and I'm a total mess.
“[The word love] clanks inside me like an iron bell that someone beats at dinnertime: love, love, love, love, love.
It is not so incomprehensible as you pretend, sweet pea. Love is the feeling we have for those we care deeply about and hold in high regard. It can be light as the hug we give a friend or heavy as the sacrifices we make for our children. It can be romantic, platonic, familial, fleeting, everlasting, conditional, unconditional, imbued with sorrow, stoked by sex, sullied by abuse, amplified by kindness, twisted by betrayal, deepened by time, darkened by difficulty, leavened by generosity, nourished by humor and “loaded with promises and commitments” that we may or may not want or keep.
The best thing you can possibly do with your life is to tackle the motherfucking shit out of love.
We’re all going to die... Hit the iron bell like it’s dinnertime.”
sometimes when I get down + I get onto one of my existential crises + I feel like I've lost myself + what I'm doing here I read that line to myself
The best thing you can possibly do with your life is to tackle the motherfucking shit out of love.
and I remind myself I better take every moment I can + ring that iron bell like it's dinnertime.
More of my love for Cheryl Strayed here
I have some solid, real-world advice if your friend is getting married.